Dave Ramsey and Direct Sales

I recently read a quote from THE Dave Ramsey which stated, "The worst thing we can do is get a second job. The best thing to do is start a home-based business." 

So now the question is, "How do I do that?!" Well, thanks to the recent explosion of direct sales companies and their popularity among americans of all ages, you could practically throw out a flare and have a hundred people lining up ready to tell you why their business is the best. 

I'm not here for that today.

I'm here to let you know the benefits of starting a home based business and how it can help you in the long run. I don't "just" do direct sales (and really, I haven't even told you which companies I represent, thankyouverymuch), I also teach private voice lessons as my main income. I went from teaching in a public school system, having administrators breathing down my neck, and drawing a consistent monthly paycheck to literally flying by the seat of my pants as I began searching for campuses and areas with a need for a voice teacher in about 3 months' time. 

So, from all the experience I've gained through breaking out of The System and diving head first into the entrepreneurial world, here's a list of what I wish I had known when (or even before) I started.

1. We waste a LOT of money on income taxes.

Really. When I was teaching, they just took money out of my check and I never thought anything about it. I would submit thousands of dollars of my hard earned income before I ever even saw it and would be thrilled to get a few hundred back in a return come April. How on earth does that make any sense?! 

As a home-based business owner, you can claim the most obscure things on your taxes as expenses and losses as long as you keep iron-clad records of what they are and save your receipts, for heaven's sake! 

Here are a few examples:

• Mileage -- you can claim your work mileage between working locations, but not from home to work and work to home...unless you work FROM home. Woah. Need groceries? Pick up a box of envelopes or an ink cartridge for your office printer while you're there and suddenly you've just made a business-related trip and can claim that mileage.
• Dinner meetings -- want to go out with your girlfriends? Bring up your business and that meal becomes more fun for your checkbook.
• Social outings -- when you meet with a potential client (a.k.a. anyone at all), as long as you "talk business" with them within 24 hours of your meeting/event, the entire expense is lumped into the claimable column.

Do your research and make sure you're abiding by the rules, but seriously, there's money to be saved by tracking your expenses.

2. You get what you give.

This is a tough one at first because you feel like you've just invested in starting up and want to turn a profit before spending more money. However, what you give does NOT have to be monetary. It can be time, it can be services, it can be presenting information. But if you don't put anything into your business after investing in it, I hate to break it to you but... your business will NOT run itself. There is no such business that allows us to pitch in once and then wake up a millionaire (if you ever find that, let me know... I've got some debt to pay off!). So get off your rear and get to work! ...on to #3.

3. What you think is work, is not the work you need to be doing.

Yes, having an organized office is important. Yes, keeping your contact list legible and alphabetized is helpful. Yes, that excel spreadsheet with your inventory is fascinating. Yes, stamping and labeling your marketing materials is a great way to ensure you are available to those who see them. 

No, none of the above qualify as work. 

Work, in an entrepreneurial sense, is productivity. It's business-building activities. It's promoting your business, your expertise, and your services so people will know who you are and what you're doing and why you're doing it. If you aren't talking to people or contacting them about your business and building relationships, you are not working. (and I bet your business isn't working very well, either, hmm?).

"If you aren't talking to people or contacting them about your business and building relationships, you are not working."

4. Talking to people about your business never gets easier.

This one is like performing, but I'm giving you the band-aid version here. The only way to get over stage fright is to perform on stage and get stage fright. You have to learn how to deal with it. It's a miserable cycle, but it literally is the ONLY way. However, talking to people about your business will ALWAYS be hard. It will ALWAYS be uncomfortable, and you will ALWAYS have that little voice in your head telling you that you should go put some more labels on your catalogs and call that customer tomorrow. Don't listen to it, just do it. The only thing to fear is fear itself... and picking up the phone to ask someone to give you their money. You can't view it that way though. Bottom line, yeah, that's probably what you want out of the conversation but sometimes talking to people about your business opens the door for them to express interest in what you do (recruiting opportunity, ding ding ding!) or makes them think of someone they know that might need to hear what you have to say. Just do it. Call, text, email, message them on social media, send them a letter in the mail... whatever you have to do, just do it. Don't wait. Someone else who is reading this may beat you to it, and then you'll be on the docks complaining because you showed up today and missed the boat that sailed last week.

5. Never, ever, ever believe that you are in control.

You're not. Ever.

I went to lunch with my first recruit this past week who, amidst our conversation about successes and why God leads us to trials that never end up going anywhere, shared a story with me. To preface this, you need to know that when I was in college, I had a seemingly meaningless library job. It was a work-study program, making $5.50/hour and I didn't think too highly of it save for the three hours a week I could sit at a desk and do my homework without disruption. I didn't take it seriously, and I only worked while the rest of the campus was at church, so it really was a very dull position and I've blocked most of the experience from my memory.

However, my friend had a different story to share. She had once asked me to cover her shift at the library because she would be out of town. I agreed, but for whatever reason (I couldn't even tell you if I tried, honestly), I ended up missing the shift and the library was left unattended. When she returned from her trip, she was fired from the position. At this point in the conversation, I felt like complete garbage and apologized, but wait... there's more.

She said she approached me about it and I "sort of blew [her] off" in response (another nomination for friend of the year goes to...), but the fact of the matter was, she was without a job and needed to replace that income. So on she went. She ended up finding an internship for the music director at a local church. Come to find out, the man who was the youth pastor's intern would soon become her husband, and the story gets really interesting from there.

While I was wallowing in my guilt for "ruining her life" by not doing what I said I would do and getting her fired, she was able to see the bigger picture. Her words to me this week were, "While I resented you for a little bit, I ended up finding a new job, and then my husband who I wouldn't have met had I not needed to find that job. So, in a way, I sort of attribute you getting me fired to me falling into the amazing life I have now."

I could count on one hand the number of times I've thought about that job after I left it. I can't tell you even an idea of why I didn't show up for that shift or what I did instead, but how incredibly humbling is it to realize that every single thing we do (or in this case, don't do) can have a magnificent effect on the people around us?

There is a far bigger plan for you than you will ever realize, and the best and worst part of it is the fact that you aren't in control of any of it, so do your best with what you've got so you can give your best to those you can.

(...even if your best is not showing up for work and getting your friend fired... which, even though it worked out for the best, I will still feel guilty about...)

Facebook Parties and Direct Sales

So you want to convert your direct sales business to strictly having parties online, huh? Let's flash back to 1999 when chat rooms and AOL Instant Messenger were, well, let's face it, THE social media. This was 4 years prior to the idea of Facebook, and while I admittedly was still in high school at the time, it was the coolest way to visit with your friends without actually having to be in their presence or on the phone, which technically wasn't true since the internet was connected to our phone lines. Ah, take a moment to reminisce with me and Dawson, I mean, James Van Der Beek:

Alright, enough of that. The only thing worse than being banned from the phone line was sitting in a chat room all by yourself. It wasn't that you didn't have any friends, it was the fact that they were too busy with their own lives to sit in front of their computers and type for hours on end with you. So you'd either log off and go to bed at a decent hour, or you would sit there searching for your favorite songs on Napster (gosh, those were the days, weren't they?) until someone haphazardly logged on and unknowingly committed to a conversation full of "Hey. What's up? How's it going?" with you. This was our civilization's first step to what I like to refer to as "anti-social social media."

Fast forward to 2014. We've had Facebook for over a decade now, and we see less and less of people regardless of how "close" we are. Our lives are constantly on the go, something is always happening, and most of us, myself included, never stop. Let's be honest here: we eat in the car, we do business on our phones (not the way you would think), and we are plugged into society and accessible 24/7, but we just can't seem to be physically present anywhere we don't absolutely have to be... and even then, as long as there's an internet connection, we're not really there either.

Naturally, the remedy to direct sales companies (which are very "party-plan" based) getting their business connected to the world would be to cater to those who are plugged in and yet are nowhere to be found! So let's set up a Facebook party! Brilliant!

We, as consultants, do all the party things we're supposed to; we set a firm date and time, we make the event look cool, we add links and convenient information so the guests can shop whenever they want, and we coach our hostesses just like we would normally. The party time rolls around, and you find yourself back in that empty chat room in 1999 wondering if you should go to sleep or just keep refreshing your screen in case your internet somehow hasn't realized that someone is actually online...

What now? Do you keep posting hoping that someone is there? Do you give up on it and risk losing that one social media unicorn who watches everything without ever making their presence known (really, how do we know if they exist or not?)? Do you start calling--who am I kidding--messaging people desperately hoping that they just forgot and that they really do care that you're sitting there trying to virtually give them your sales pitch?

Any of those are the "right" answer, but none of them end up being profitable for you. So here's my solution: GET OFF THE INTERNET.

I know. Harsh. But really, if they're not available for you, why are you wasting your time?! People aren't on Facebook to be sold to. Period. They're on Facebook to be social. The department stores of life don't invite you to exclusive online parties. The business executives of the world don't invite you to Facebook meetings. So why do direct sales people invite their clients to virtual shows??? Because we don't know how else to connect to this oxymoron of a social media-based world! We care too much. We don't want to be intrusive or require too much time from our guests. We want to be convenient and considerate and we want people to come to us when THEY want to come to us. Ladies and gents, that's sweet and all, but that doesn't make any sense!!!

This is a business. You are a traveling sales person. TRAVEL. Use Skype or live video chat or meet for coffee! BE SOMEWHERE. ("online" doesn't count as a "place-form" noun by the way)

Personal anecdote time: One of my colleagues/friends invited me to an event earlier this week. She set it up as a Facebook event. I rsvp'd as a "yes," not really reading it all (guilty as charged) and didn't even realize it was a real event, like "in person," until she did all the good hostess things - - she posted that she would be covering the appetizers and fountain drinks and that she would love for us all to get together for a girl's night, sent reminder texts and "can't wait to see you tonight" messages, posted directions on the event wall... "Oh, I guess I have dinner plans now!" So I went to meet up with her and when I arrived, I found her whole direct sales business set-up on display in the party room of the restaurant. She had FOURTEEN people there, folks, and not a single one of us knew it was coming. Now, had she said "Come shop and buy stuff from me because I need your help financially" would we have shown up? NO. Well, probably not. But she catered to our social side--a girls night, free food, fun, camaraderie.... were we upset? Well, maybe a little, but only because we were fooled. Did we all leave there thinking, "Wow, that was so much fun! I'm glad I came!" Of course! Did she have a $600+ retail sales party? Yup. Wanna know why? Because she got us there, silly!

Now, I've done the online party trainings, and I've paid my hard-earned money for the files and the pictures and the verbiage to use to get people to shop online, but for one of my businesses, my average online party sales are at a whopping $175. That's not bad, but it's not great either. What are my average in-home party sales, you ask? $460. Now, I'm not very good at math, but I can tell you that is a BIG DIFFERENCE.

Your product is awesome! YOU are awesome! Your presentation might be awesome too, but those sorts of things can always be improved (practice makes perfect, after all!) so you need people to practice on! I wish I could say I've never done a real show. I wish I could tell you that every time I practice my party performance, I reward my hostesses a thousand times over, but alas, I have been sucked into the mindset that I am going to a home show to try to sell things to customers and I've been disappointed in myself for doing everything "right" and not getting the results I was after. That's our main goal right? Meet/find people, get them to buy, get them to get their friends to buy, lather, rinse, repeat. That's your strategy for online parties, too, huh? How's that working for ya?

If you're anything like me, it's not. So, short story long, run away from the sales-person mindset as fast as you can. Do it. Right now. Convince yourself that you are in the business of making friends and helping people. Then, when there's literally no other way to party with your hostess than to use social media, you log on and approach that new Facebook party full of strangers and friends of friends like it was a real live party and take a minute to get them talking to you. Who are they? Why did your hostess invite them? How do they all know each other? Just like you would do at a home show. (Or at least like I HOPE you are doing at a home show!) Make them realize you are investing in them as people. After all, it takes a really brave person to talk to the "new girl" at a party without someone else introducing them, so don't take it personally when they don't go out of their way to get to know you first.

Invest in them as people so they will invest in you. If you MUST use social media as your party place (it's still not a place, but I digress...), pretend these names and profile pictures are real people looking at you in person. Greet them all as you would if they were walking into your house. Introduce yourself, explain how you know their connection (hostess or whoever invited them--whichever is applicable), and how glad you are that they showed up--or, if your Facebook event invites go unnoticed like many of mine do, how excited you WILL be WHEN they rsvp...

Find out where they are so you can get there, too. I honestly think this is why those Facebook party scripts are so finicky. There's not a magical set of posts that you can copy and paste and then see 20 orders in your workstation. Guidelines exist, and by all means those are invaluable for any brand of consultant, but they aren't guaranteed for every crowd, so make yours personal and friendly and approachable. Try it, be human, be real, and be genuine. They're really just dating you, so don't expect them to give it all away on the first date if you took the cheap route and just took them for a stroll around the block instead of wine and dining them...

That's probably enough analogies for now.  You get it right? Be human, be personable, and be interested in them....try this out on your next online party and then let me know how it goes!



The next blog post will be about feedback... so stay tuned!

Congratulations! You joined a direct sales company for the discount!

So, you joined a direct sales company for the discount. Awesome! Now here are some vital things you need to know about how you got tricked into being an entrepreneur and how to make the most of it. (You know it's true... just keep reading. ;-) )

The first three months with any direct sales company are usually your "fast/quick start" months, where you can successfully jump-start your business and get bonuses for doing so. Your upline/sponsor should be coaching you to accomplish those fast start goals so you can establish your business and earn back your investment within 90ish days.

This is your trial period, or in Katie Terms "your first 12 dates with the company." You're sort of committed because you invested in a kit, but you're not convinced you are ready to quit your day job and make this part of your everyday life. You already know that the first few encounters will be awkward, but you're still excited because it's new and different and has potential. Let's face it, you already have your "break up if it's not working out" date decided, so you might as well try to make it work in the meantime.

Regardless of your intentions when you purchase your kit, you begin as a consultant. There is no "hobbyist option" for your first three months. Everything you need to run your business is included in your kit, so use it while you have it! You have nothing to lose for trying, but sitting on it and doing nothing basically wastes your investment, so TRY IT. Host your launch party, share the excitement (you ARE excited, right? Of course! Because you know how awesome the products are! So share that!!!), and get in the habit of asking for favors. Start with your close circle of friends and family (that you invite to your launch party...)--ask them if they would invite a few friends over so you can practice your presentation. Don't ask them to book a party or generate sales... ask them to help you PRACTICE. The worst they can say is no! So, when they say ok, you set a date right then and there and you make it real obvious that you are counting on that party to help you figure this "direct sales" stuff out as if it's the difference between paying your mortgage or going bankrupt. Let them know how grateful you are for their help and they won't be able to bail on you! When the party day comes around, you put on your very best "I've got this" face and go to their party as if they are going to give you $1000 if you do well and you "practice" on them as if it's the real deal. (it totally is, but they don't have to know that.) You take orders, you show them how to use whatever it is you're selling, you tell the guests about our products, and you explain the hostess benefits and opportunity. Then you ask them for feedback (What?! Yep, that's what I said. You absolutely ask them for feedback! Trust me!!) and if they would be willing to let you practice with their friends and see if you can fix any of those issues or polish your presentation. How could they say no to that? It doesn't cost them anything extra, and they get a personal morale boost knowing that they are really teaching YOU and realizing that you value them as people with opinions rather than just counting them as your "income generators." (they get host rewards too, but that comes later when they're surprised that your practice party got to "how much?!?!" and you get to build THEIR excitement...)

Then you repeat this process over, and over, and over... and by the end of your first three months, I bet you'll have earned back your investment and more... THEN, after those first 3 months are over and your business has accomplished whatever it is you needed to accomplish, THAT's when you decide whether you want to do it for the fun of it or if you want to keep earning easy money and having fun in the process.

Recruiting Blurb

At this point in my business, my advice on recruiting is to invest in the people. If you are out talking people to get another name on your team, you need to back up and reassess. The people you are talking to don't want to be bodies, they don't want to be on someone's "downline" and their top priority is not helping you promote. They don't want to take on this business to help YOU. They want [business] to (fill in the blank) for THEM. So make it about them.

My waitress at dinner the other day was pretty absent. It was a business dinner, so I was meeting with a client after an event. We came in late (close to closing time, but not so late that we would leave after the doors locked) and we didn't order a "high ticket meal." She didn't earn her tip, that's for sure. But I got her to loosen up near the end of our meal by apologizing for being her last table (we weren't, but "a spoonful of sugar...") and started talking about when I was waitressing and how it would make me so crazy when people would come in at the last second and order a well done 20 oz steak. She opened up and indicated that she wasn't all that thrilled with her job, but has a ton of student loans to pay back. I left her a $6 tip on a $20 tab and put it with my biz card. I wrote "30% commission, no quotas, no bosses, and flexible hours. Text me if you're interested." Now, I haven't heard back from her, but I can guarantee she took a minute to read that and go "Hmm..." Next time I go there, I'll ask for her table and see if she remembers me. Then I'll ask about her hours, and her workload, and then her student loan progress, and we'll only go up from there.

It's like scouting... you don't just want anyone on your team (although some random acquaintances will surprise you, and that's totally ok!). You want people who are willing to try new things, who are social, who communicate effectively, and who love the products. Football coaches don't recruit players just because they're fit. They go to games, they watch them play, they interview them and find out how dedicated to the team they really would be, they find out their price (ding ding ding! "How much would you like to make in a month? Let me show you how you can do that..."), and then they sell themselves to that person. "I'm going to be the best coach you can find that will help YOU reach YOUR goals (which helps the team as well, wink wink) because.... [fill in the blank]."

Be a good coach. Help them help you.

How To Be Present When You Just Can't Be There

We live in a busy world where we can virtually interact with just about anyone whenever we want. It's convenient to email, to post on a wall, to private message, to text. We send out requests and our friends and family can respond whenever it's convenient for them. How awesome is that?!

This technological blessing poses a huge social problem though: real-life interaction has become an inconvenience. It's harder to make time for other people (the time it takes to make an appointment that is "convenient" for all parties, the time it takes to get to them or for them to get to you, the time it takes to actually converse, face to face, and the time it takes to return to life as normal) when you can spend 10-15 seconds online and "like" or comment to show you care and it's perfectly acceptable.

I don't know about you, but I actually miss the days where a phone call was considered normal. We learned how to interact and interpret tone of voice and verbiage when facial expressions and body language weren't included, how to make meaningful (and sometimes not) conversation on the spot, how to be spontaneous and how to speak our mind with tact and grace. Sure, I've said some really dumb things before and hurt feelings when I didn't mean to, and I've even spent hours on the phone saying nothing at all. It was the idea that someone was there for me and I for them, their presence, availability, and willingness to dedicate their time to me was the most meaningful. Sure, 10-15 seconds counts, but there's nothing like that feeling after you've unexpectedly run into someone you haven't seen in [fill in the blank] at the supermarket and spent 2 minutes catching up. Face to face. The odds of you being in the same place at the same time without having planned it are slim to none, but it happened! Your paths crossed and wow, how great it was to see them! "We should get together soon!"

There it is. The social kiss of death. An ambiguous open invitation for face-to-face interaction with no defined time frame or activity.

I am the absolute worst at doing this. Using "soon" to set up another visit and realizing that years later I still haven't made the commitment to make time for that person. Phone calls have become reserved for telemarketers (no matter how many times I put my number on the "do not call" list, which is ironic in and of itself) and refilling my prescriptions. I can't even tell you the last time I called a friend "just to chat." And now I have to confess something to you: this blog post is actually more for me than it is for you!

My second direct sales company was founded on the "person-to-person" contact I mentioned in my previous post. We're not allowed to have "virtual parties" or "online catalog shows." They want us to interact with people! That's actually one of the main things that drew me to it. I thought, "this business philosophy will give me an excuse...no, an opportunity to branch out and see people!"

The underlying tag on there is the word "sooner." Tell me, what is sooner than soon? I promise I'm not trying to mimic Dr. Seuss and make a funny play on words here. If you don't have a planner that's attached to your person at all times managing what you're doing when and where, soon will never be defined, and most likely, I could've just said, "soon will never be." Isn't that sad???

So, how do we fix this? Well, for starters, we rid our vocabulary of the word soon and change it to "next week," "next month," or better yet, "next Tuesday at 6." The organizational gurus out there will benefit from actually writing it down - making the invisible offer attached to something makes it visible, makes it real, and makes it a commitment. It says, "I am saving this time for you."

Now, in a perfect world, we all do as we say and reserve that time, show up, connect, fill our social quota, and set up another opportunity (not again sometime, or soon, or later in the month) so the process will repeat. But we live in THIS world and conflicts happen! ALL THE TIME! I would actually be surprised if a conflict hasn't come up at least once while you're reading this (and mega kudos to you if it has and you've come back to finish it)!

So, how can you be there without actually being there? Here are a few of the ways I've found to overcome the scheduling obstacles, and I encourage you to try them out.

1. Make a phone call--5 minutes is WAY easier than counting the time to get ready, go somewhere, communicate, and come back. The challenge is in making those 5 minutes count. If you're anything like me now that technology has taken over our interactions, you'll absolutely relate to this video.
2. Ask if you can use FaceTime/Skype if you really wanted to attend something but just couldn't get out of [fill in the blank].
3. Offer an alternative. "I'm sorry, Suzie, I thought I had that time open, but [x] has come up... can we meet for coffee on the 10th so you can fill me in on what I missed?" Easy peasy. Oh, and you get one-on-one time instead of interacting with a group, which is always a perk for the introverts out there!
4. Mail a hand-written letter if you're not a phone-call person. (I do this a LOT.) The time it takes you to sit down, write it out, and mail it off speaks volumes about your dedication to reaching out to them. It's still convenient - they can read it whenever, but odds are you'll make their day.

Now, in reference to home-shows and direct sales, all of the above are applicable, but there are a couple more (probably obvious) options available for you:

1. Shop online or make a purchase if possible. It shows you support their endeavors even though you can't actually be there for the fun. (Challenge: schedule an in-person catalog viewing with your friend so you can see them AND support them all at the same time!)
2. Share it with your friends. Maybe you can't attend or make a purchase, but one of your friends might, and as we've discussed earlier, the more connections we can make, the better!
3. Schedule your own show from that hostess' referral. Yes, this means making a commitment on your own, but often times, the hostess will get an extra perk for referring friends and you'll have another chance to get together with your crowd as well as your friend. Double bonus!
4. Interact with the online event page as much as possible. 10-15 seconds once a day for the week leading up to the party is nothing compared to the disappointed and lonely feeling a hostess gets when no one is responding, no one RSVP's, and no one participates. Your interaction actually helps "weight" the event in other people's newsfeed so they are more likely to see it, which increases the odds of more people participating, joining, hosting, buying, connecting, etc.

See? There are ways to show you care other than buying things! And if the stars align and you CAN attend the event, do not show up with the preconception that you have to buy something to matter. Your presence is what matters. Your friendship, interaction, and the fact that you reserved some of your time to be spent with that person is monumental for your relationship. Your purchase is simply a bonus.


I hope you enjoyed this post. Let me know if you try the tips out and how it changes your social life! As always, you're welcome to add a constructive comment below, subscribe to this blog, or visit me on Facebook at Touch Of Class and/or Touch Of Destiny.

Direct Sales 101 - My journey from "Once."

I was the biggest skeptic when it came to these "direct sales," "multi-level marketing" companies that seem to be taking the nation by storm. I thought they were all a scam and I rarely ever considered buying anything, much less joining one as a consultant. The words, "pyramid scheme" and "not even worth the discount" were frequently part of my vocabulary. However, my friends would occasionally dabble in these opportunities either by hosting or joining one and, trying to be a good and supportive friend, I developed a policy for myself: I'll buy ONE thing from ONE party to help each friend who hosts. Once. That was all. I thought this was a fantastic way to keep my house from being overrun with colorful bags I don't use, weight-loss products that would work wonders if I could stop paying back my college loans and put the money toward their supplements, cosmetics that cause my skin to blemish instead of beam, and smells that linger to make one big, invisible scent stew that will never seem to go away. Besides, these people were EVERYWHERE, so if I ever REALLY needed what they had to offer, I could probably just blast a request on social media and have at least 5 consultants begging for my business...

For many years, this rule/ideology served me well, and I convinced myself that I was faithfully helping out my friends while keeping my checkbook in check. I never really listened to the pitches given at home parties. Sure, I sat there, eyes fixated on the presenter as if I was going to die if I didn't hear how THEIR company could benefit ME and make MY life easier, but I was only playing the role of an eager client with the intent of playing it once to avoid being hounded for the next several months and worrying about getting "caught" buying similar products from another consultant three weeks later to help another friend and, in turn, possibly having to explain my disloyalty as a customer. I was the epitome of what direct sales trainers call "opposition."

In April of 2013, one of my friends who hadn't been scratched off the list of "once's" invited me to an online party. I ignored the invitation for a good week, and on the last day, she posted that she was THIS close to her party goal to get x-amount of products for free or half price. Oh, and there was a deal for new customers. Inevitably a bargain shopper, I took the bait. I bought a "set" of vinyl wraps that were supposed to give me a cheap and easy manicure or pedicure and it was supposed to last for 2-4 weeks.

Words can't describe how duped I felt when I opened up that package 5 days later and pulled out 4 flimsy sheets of "stickers," but, knowing this friend and trusting her well-established credibility with product reviews, I tried them out. I read something about a 7-day challenge and how these wraps will change your life (Where have we heard that before???) and figured, "why not? I've got them, might as well try them." So I went to the website where the application video was and followed the directions to a T. They were more impressive than I had originally thought, and, having been challenged, I promptly went outside and did some yard work with them on. Then I gave my dogs a bath... and taught my students clay sculpting... and used tempera paint with my kindergartners... and cleaned my bathrooms... It seemed like no matter what I did, my nails still looked amazing. This was completely bizarre to me, because while I was trying to destroy these things, I was getting more compliments on my nails than ever before. I found that just wearing them caught the attention of just about everyone I encountered. This is brilliant! I thought. I wouldn't even have to work to sell these things!

That's when it hit me: A direct sales company finally got to me. There was no turning back.

I joined as a consultant at the end of May. I ate from the once forbidden fruit, and my nails looked amazing while I did it. I resigned from my teaching job with no other position lined up so I could "stay at home" with my 2 year old son, and I sold a whopping 8 sheets in June and July. Ouch. Talk about a kick in the teeth. But you know what was weird? During those two months without much success, I was working on putting my business supplies together, making connections, and researching the differences between my product and the competition. I faithfully posted pictures of my nails and talked about my new endeavor on social media even though I didn't get much feedback. Once August hit, an estranged friend requested a party. Then another one did the same, and several others inquired about it and made small purchases to try them out. I sent out samples and attended vendor events and met new people and by October, I had a team of 5 people "under" me, my commissions covered the cost of my house payment, AND I was already working toward joining ANOTHER direct sales company.

What?!?! You really CAN make money in direct sales?!?!

Believe me, I'm as shocked as you are. But here's the deal: over the past 8 months I have found the following statement to be true beyond my understanding:

The best and most reliable type of business I've found is... wait for it... Person-to-person.

But what does that mean? Can't I just email people and let them buy if they want to or ignore me without having to actually talk to them and be rejected?

Well, yes, but you'll get better results if you swallow your fear of being shot down and just ask them. Face-to-face. One-on-one. Person-to-person. Notice I didn't say, "Consultant-to-customer" or "Representative-to-stranger." If you're one of those skeptics like I described myself earlier, you had better make sure you're sitting down because this next sentence may surprise you: Direct Sales ISN'T all about quotas and recruiting and marketing your products. Let me say that again: Direct Sales is NOT about selling stuff. Direct Sales is about CONNECTING people. It's like a real-life social network. Sure, it may have been designed to get company products out to the public and to make the CEO's and executives rich, but here's what really happens:

1. I join a company as an independent consultant/distributor/representative/etc. 
2. I tell you about it, and you decide that what I have to offer would be cool to have yourself so you agree to "host a show." 
3. You invite all of your friends on social media or your email list so you can get the most "bang for your buck" back in host rewards or incentives given by me or the company I "work for." (remember, I'm independent so I get to be my own boss, I'm just helping distribute their products.)
4. Let's say a handful of them show up, listen to my pitch, and a few sales are made.
5. You get free and discounted stuff, and say 2 of those friends of yours decide they liked me well enough, had fun, and got some cool stuff, so they're going to have their own show. (which you'll probably attend because, well, they came to your show to help you out, so why wouldn't you go to theirs?)
6. They repeat the process above just like you did and as I'm building new relationships with your friends and THEIR friends (and getting to see you more at the same time--double bonus!), my "selling tree" starts spreading it's branches and turning into more of a "relationship tree" where I become the common denominator connecting groups of people that wouldn't have ever been introduced otherwise.
7. My frequent customers become comrades seemingly overnight and my support system builds itself as I take care of my clients as though they were family. I get to the point where I have one host that needs just a little more help, so I call my "regulars" (by now known as "my friends") and they are just as excited to hear from me as they are to help out this new person, who, whether they know it or not, is being inducted into my family of happy and supportive customers.
8. As I weave this beautiful, intricate social tapestry together, some of these connections decide they want to be even closer and join my team, which integrates new people, groups, and builds new ties into what once was simply a friendship between you and me.

Boy, that escalated fast, didn't it? Now, I'm not going to let you leave here thinking ALL independent [fill in the blanks] work this way, because I know for a fact that they don't. Some are so driven by numbers and deadlines that they will always need that last product sold to get this raise or one more recruit to get this incentive or achieve that higher rank and that is perfectly fine. That's what they're SUPPOSED to do. That's what this marketing strategy was made for, however, no matter how they're run or what drives them to keep on trying, none of them will be able to find success without the PRESENCE of PEOPLE.

Through this transition in my life, I have learned that my previous attitude kept me from enjoying a LOT of opportunities that I automatically rejected. I'm still that person that will buy once, but I understand now that that ONE time could make a HUGE difference in the grand scheme of things and it has directly affected the way I go about my business management and leadership. And for the record, those products I mentioned earlier have grown on me because I was honest with the people who believed in them and learned that it wasn't the product that left something to be desired, it was the user's attitude.

I am not typical. My independent businesses are driven by connections. My independent success depends on the people I recruit as family. My goals are not based on how much money I make, how many products I sell, or how many people I have in my "downline" (I really hate that term by the way, but I can address that in another blog post on another day) and how successful they are. I value people and their presence in my life. I want to be connected to you.

If you take nothing else from this narrative, please at the very least take a moment more to consider this: It is very difficult to make connections and/or build relationships if you don't show up.

I believe that everyone we meet has some significance and we can't find out what it is unless we invest in time with them. So when someone invites you to a show or a party or a chat over coffee, let your curiosity lead you and just go if you're available. Yes, you will probably be asked or persuaded to buy something. Yes, you will probably be asked to host a show of your own. Yes, you might even have to say no...and you might have to say it more than once. But you might just find that "Once" that really makes a difference in your life, and the question is not whether or not it was worth your time, but whether or not you were there to decide.



Did you like this piece? Let me know your thoughts! Subscribe, share it on facebook, and stay tuned. The next topic will be "How to be present when you just can't make it."